Do you suspect that someone close to you is a narcissist? In this article, you will learn how to expose a narcissist and how to deal with it!
How to Expose a Narcissist?
You no longer recognize yourself. You used to be an independent man or woman full of self-confidence, joie de vivre, love, and fun. But you’ve lost that over the years. You increasingly feel that you have lost yourself, and you have trouble trusting other people. Now that you’re thinking about it more, you suddenly realize how small your world has become, and you wonder who you can really count on.
Until an acquaintance draws your attention to whether you might be living with a narcissist and have therefore become a victim of narcissistic abuse. You immediately go online at home, and the puzzle pieces fall into place. You see many similarities in your life and are especially curious about how you can break free from this negative spiral.
The First Step to Expose a Narcissist
Very well! Often, the first step is the hardest, and you’ve just taken it. It’s possible that you are currently living with a narcissist and suffering from narcissistic abuse. This is not a healthy situation, and the only solution is to distance yourself from it. A narcissist cannot change their behavior, so therapy is not a solution.
But first, let’s determine if we’re really dealing with a narcissist here. Mislabeling someone is not what you want, and it’s challenging to call someone a narcissist without specialist knowledge. However, you can form a good understanding based on the symptoms. For convenience, let’s refer to the person we’re discussing as “the suspected narcissist.”
A narcissist always exhibits several characteristics that stand out. We will discuss these features together. If you’re dealing with a narcissist, this article can be quite confronting.
You should know that you are not alone. You are on a website written for and by someone who has experienced narcissistic abuse. Feel free to contact us at any time with questions or to participate in the ‘30-Day Narcissism Free Challenge.’
Also, don’t forget to download our free eBook for tips on how to recover from narcissistic abuse. You can read it again at your leisure if needed.
5 Characteristics Exposing a Narcissist
Now that you suspect you may be dealing with a narcissistic person, let’s explore 5 characteristics commonly exhibited by narcissists. These traits are prevalent among almost all narcissists, providing you with a clearer understanding of whether the suspected individual is indeed a narcissist. Remember, you’re not a psychologist, so exercise caution with accusations.
If you discover that you are dealing with a narcissist, there are tools available to help you distance yourself from them and rediscover happiness and pleasure in life. Ultimately, that’s our goal!
Attempting to change a narcissist is akin to a mission impossible. I learned this firsthand, and numerous studies have substantiated this fact. In reality, confronting a narcissist is strongly discouraged.
Primarily, a narcissist will never admit to having a narcissistic personality disorder. What’s even more challenging is that the narcissist may use this against you, portraying you as the narcissist. This will only exacerbate the downward spiral you may currently find yourself in.
How to Expose a Narcissist – Feature #1: Quick Anger
A narcissist’s behavior is unpredictable. In one moment, everything may seem cozy with a narcissist, and a positive atmosphere prevails. However, in the blink of an eye, the situation can completely turn around, and the narcissist becomes angry. An hour later, they might be happy again, acting as if nothing happened an hour ago.
It’s designed to drive you crazy! You might start thinking it’s your fault, but it absolutely is not. This is one of the defining characteristics of a narcissist. You never know where you stand because their behavior is highly unpredictable.
Did you know that a narcissist can get angry if you’re enjoying yourself? Unbelievable, but true. For the same reasons, narcissists dislike birthdays, vacations, and other enjoyable activities. In hindsight, it makes sense because someone with narcissistic traits craves the spotlight. If they sense losing that attention, others will have to pay for it.
How to Expose a Narcissist – Feature #2: Isolating People
Do you find yourself remembering the days when you used to hang out with a lot more people? Maybe you used to meet up with friends frequently and have more regular conversations with family members and colleagues. Where have those good times gone?
Do you feel that the suspected narcissist has caused you to be in much less contact with friends, relatives, and colleagues at the moment, or perhaps not at all? That might indeed be the case!
This is one of the strategies a narcissist employs to influence you.
A narcissist aims to make you more dependent. The more dependent you become, the more power they have over you—precisely what a narcissist desires.
Hence, a narcissist will work to isolate you from family and friends, all without you realizing it. By manipulating relationships and maintaining constant communication with you, they naturally decrease your interactions with other people. They want to have complete control over you, and achieving this brings them satisfaction.
How to Expose a Narcissist – Feature #3: Always Blaming Others
“It’s YOUR fault!”
Do you often hear this from the suspected narcissist? Even though it is clearly not your fault, and any sane person would realize this? Unfortunately, I know how you feel.
My mother was a narcissist and blamed me for everything, even if it was obviously her own fault or someone else’s. The people around her always agreed with her, which made me doubt. But now that I’m older, I know better. Wisdom comes with time. Later, I’ll share more about flying monkeys!
Once again, a narcissist never blames themselves but always shifts the blame onto someone else. Because no one is better than the narcissist, and taking the blame means you’re weak, at least in the eyes of a narcissist.
How to Expose a Narcissist – Feature #4: Lying often
Ever wondered who the best liars in the world are? They aren’t actors; they’re narcissists. They lie about small things and also exaggerate situations, making them bigger and more beautiful than they are. You won’t find evidence to know whether it really happened that way because, of course, it only happens to them.
How to Expose a Narcissist – Feature #5: Flying Monkeys
Have you ever heard of the term “flying monkeys“? I mentioned it before, but this refers to people who are essentially the servants of a narcissist.
Often, a narcissist does not operate alone; they have help in abusing the target. A flying monkey can also be someone who, in turn, is manipulated by the narcissist.
A flying monkey often believes the narcissist’s stories and supports the narcissist, consciously or unconsciously, in carrying out narcissistic abuse. Perhaps there are also one or more flying monkeys in your circle who always side with the narcissist, making you believe that it’s your fault (Feature #3). Don’t let these flying monkeys fool you. Watch out for people who speak highly of the possible narcissist because, for their benefit, they will undoubtedly tell the narcissist everything you share with them.
Time to say goodbye
Now that you have learned about the five characteristics of a narcissist, you are better equipped to expose one. Do you believe you have identified the suspected narcissist?
If your answer is a resounding “Yes,” it’s time to bid farewell to the narcissist. This might not be an easy decision, given all the damage the narcissist has caused.
However, it’s the only right step you can take. Narcissists don’t change, but you do have the power to change your own future.
You may also want to read the article ‘Leaving the Narcissist – What’s holding you back?‘ for more insights.
Our Resources for Victims of Narcissistic Abuse
As you’re aware, UnmaskingNarcissism.com is created by and for victims of narcissistic abuse.
We understand how you feel—unfortunately! However, every disadvantage has its advantage. Given our shared experiences, we can also offer you help!
To assist you, we’ve developed several tools based on our knowledge and experience.
One valuable resource that complements the content of this article is the ‘30-Day Narcissism Free Challenge.’ Here, you will learn:
- How to better protect yourself from narcissistic abuse
- Strategies to break free from the narcissist and maintain your freedom
- Ways to overcome narcissistic manipulations and restore your self-confidence
After completing this online program, you will once again embody the powerful, confident individual who delights in life.
Forum
Strength in Unity!
That’s why we’ve established our own forum. Who could better assist you than those who’ve walked the same path and have reached a point you aspire to – freedom from narcissistic abuse.
Forums have proven to be invaluable resources for many victims of narcissistic abuse. Feel free to seek help or share your experiences in our dedicated forum. You’re warmly welcome!
Free Ebook: 10 Tips for Recovery from Narcissistic Abuse
Free Ebook: 10 Tips for Recovery from Narcissistic Abuse
I also have a free e-book available for you: ‘10 Tips for Recovery from Narcissistic Abuse.’
I co-authored this book with psychologist Corry de Rooy, creating the ideal blend of a psychologist’s knowledge and an experienced expert’s insights. After reading this book, you will be able to:
- Set your boundaries
- Break free from the influence of a narcissist
- Understand how a narcissist affects you
- Cultivate a positive mindset
- Rediscover the joy of life
- You'll be 100 steps closer to a happy life
I’ve already assisted many victims with this e-book, and I hope to help many more. Take the first step toward recovery and download it now.
Act now!
If you feel that your situation is hopeless, it’s crucial to take action immediately. Sign up for the ‘30-Day Narcissism Free Challenge.’ You’ve already taken the first step by reading this article. Now, take the second step towards the prospect of a happy and positive life again!
